Friendship

People who have warm friends are healthier and happier than those who have none. A single real friend is a treasure worth more than gold or precious stones. Money can buy many things, good and evil. All the wealth of the world could not buy you a friend or pay you for the loss of one.
G. D. Prentice

Last week I had a sad week.  I'm not sure how it sneaked up on me but it did.  Those who know me well know that I am optimistic and spin a little sunshine onto most everything.  I have a sense of humor. Last week I couldn't find it.  I looked but it just wasn't there. Maybe it was a case of the February blahs but I felt very much alone.  Like I didn't have a friend left in the world.

I am learning on my journey that there are all kinds of friends and friendships.  Each unique and special in its own way.  Some are deeper than others but they are all meaningful.  Every interaction gives and takes.  Some more than others.

Over the past several years I have surrounded myself with some smart, professional and very busy women.  We have shared values and beliefs.  We enjoy the same activities.  We have some amazing conversations.  We can laugh together.  Some of my  favourite people are also mothers of multiple young children. Some have full time jobs and full time families. The key word here is BUSY.

My old life has almost come to a stand still in so many ways.  I no longer drive therefore I'm not at the school, grocery store, dance lessons or yoga class,  where my friends are.  I have multiple, not so fun side effects so I can forget about going out in the evening unless I do tons of prep work prior.  Sometimes I make plans with friends then have to cancel because I'm not well enough to attend. Last summer I went on holidays with some childhood friends.  I thought I was having a good time until I realized I had medicated myself,  with an anti anxiety medication, for the entire week in order to survive it.  I haven't spoken to two of those friends since.

My closest friend right now is a stranger that lives 950 km away.  Brought together by fate, we are living parallel lives.  Besides John, she is the only one who really understands.  She is my constant, unwavering, most loyal friend and it took a monster to help us find each other.

Many of my friends lives have carried on.  BUSY.  Some friends have left me completely behind.  BUSY. Some are less available.  BUSY.  Some are completely available but I can no longer keep up.  BUSY.  My good friends continue to call, message and invite. They continue to include me in their lives and are still interested in mine. I am grateful for those friends.  I suppose I could work a little harder on other friendships but.... BUSY.  And my family.... I won't even go there.