An anniversary of sorts

Here we are at the four year mark.
The headache that determined the course of the rest of our lives.
Hearing the fear in both Dr Fiddler and Dr Gammons voices.
The secrets and the faking it through the holiday season and beyond.
The beginning of test after test....
The beginning of having doctor after doctor shocked that I survived three births without having a stroke.
The beginning of having to explain over and over again the impossible to everyone.
The beginning of the catch phrase, "ticking time bomb."
The beginning of preparing for the worse and hoping against the odds for the best.
The beginning of many untruths.
The beginning of "new normal."

The only thing that has been consistently solid is my five and for them I am grateful.
My family looks different.
My friends are different.
I often completely forget about my three years at CLHC and skip back to OEYC and the relationships that got a foot hold there.
My short term memory is not intact. I'm missing some (many) of the details but it's easy to remember how people have made me feel.